Bourbon Street – naked girls and live bands

19 Oct

Now I have been told The Real Mc Coy is the most depraved nightclub in Moscow… Needless to say the only time I made an attempt to go there, whilst my friends (expats!) were being refused entry, I was negotiating a ride on a horse… at 3am. So there will be no comparison to The Real McCoy. However, what I do know is rock n roll, sleazy bars and dirty music across Europe have been graced with my presence – and now Bourbon Street has too.

“Please do not bring your children here”

Having been there 3 or 4 times, I have only had trouble with Feiscontrol once – where we, very blatantly, weren’t being let in for the simple reason that we were English speakers. There’s a simple way around that though: keep your mouth shut, and look dour. If not, if you look cool enough to be in there, just stand there, no matter how much the bouncer says no and eventually someone more influential might take a liking to you and go over the head of the bouncer.

Inside, it’s small and poky with a little crow’s nest like hangout in the corner – try avoid having to sit there, it’s rather tiny and it involves climbing a wooden ladder. The bar is as long as the building and if you follow it to the end, through the crowded narrow passage, you will get to a stage and to the left, what appears to be a VIP seating area. Although, from experience, it seems to be where the drunk girls dance on the sofas before crashing out.

“Bourbon Street is a bar of 2 diverging philosophies: weeknight / weekend – choose wisely”

Food? Me thinks not, this is a place to go when you have already eaten and have or are ready to start drinking – seriously. On week nights it’s quite calm and not a bad place for a drink and a chat. Weekends : a spiralling sinkhole of depravity, they should have a sign, they probably do: “hanging out is for hippies.” The interior  has nothing of note except a large flatscreen tv which plays photos of the previous nights of drunken savagery, these generally include photos of strippers, boobs and drunk people. Look towards the only window, at the entrance, you will see a pole. If you are lucky, there will be someone dancing on it – last week, a girl stripped off completely, unpaid and unrequested, then proceeded to demonstrate the excellent work of her bikini wax artist. If you are unlucky, someone might simply be dancing on the bar.

Bourbon Street is not comfortable, small wooden tables, small wooden chairs (for a change) a long bar with stools, and a crowded gangway towards an even more crowded and, if possible, even smaller stage… 2 toilets with cowboy saloon doors, unisex as always. Bourbon Street doesn’t care about your comfort, BS is rock n roll, hard music, hot ladies and live blues – if you are looking for something more refined, try Strelka.

Drinks are average, beers about 180rub, vodka about 90rub a shot (russian style 50ml).

Where is it: bottom of Ulitsa Myasnitskaya. Between metro Lubyanka and Kitai Gorod right beside Propaganda, 1min walk from Pirogi, excellent for a salvaging breakfast afterwards.

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